Escaping your Comfort Zone

 We tend to wall ourselves into a comfort zone. A place where we are not afraid, angry, overly joyful, any feeling that is more than what we are used to. 

I have seen this as a counselor, AA Sponsor, and my involvement with Al Anon members.  The norm, whatever that may be becomes a comfort zone.  In abusive relationships it becomes every day status quo. The abuser will abuse. It is expected and accepted. The alcoholic will come home drunk. It is expected and accepted. The hoarding, over-eating, gambling, sex addiction will continue because it is expected and accepted. Why??

From the outside looking in, we see people going through this and ask why they allow all this to happen. How can they stand this day after day?  It is much like the frog in the boiling water. If you put a frog in cold water and let it heat to boiling, the frog will just sit there until it boils to death. If you throw frog into water already at the boil, it will jump out, which of course is the sane thing to do. Too many people have slowly boiling comfort zones. Eventually they will just boil to death.

Getting out of one's comfort zone is a scary thing. It involves the unknown (or unremembered) and sometimes being on one's own. When you have become (co) dependent on a relationship or situation, venturing out can be terrifying. You have to think to yourself that anything has got to be better than what is going on now.  Seek counseling, AA, Al Anon, Energy Healing. Whatever is going to nudge you to take a look at yourself and help you make positive changes.

Now, all that being said, remember comfort zones are not exclusive to relationships. They are also relevant to things like jobs, career choices, and attitudes. A good example would be someone who hates their job, and wants to change it, but their comfort zone may be the income. We go into what if  thinking which we talked about in an earlier blog. Sometimes you need to just DO IT. Fear is the biggest block we face. I had a martial arts master tell me that fear never killed anyone. It is the reaction to fear that is the killer.  But that is an entirely different blog. Overcome the fear and you can do anything you want. Take that first step. 

I talk fear more in my book The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

May you have a wonderful day, and take that first step. 

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ADD TO CART is not a therapy

 

No Doubt we have all felt the effects of solitude and separation- anxiety during the Pandemic of 2020. There are only so many re-runs of That 70's Show you can watch before you want a change.  

Some turn to various interests such as drawing, writing, music, painting, arts and crafts and the like. Others turn to online shopping. 

I actually got this idea from a meme I saw posted. 

Therapist: "And what do we say when we are feeling lonely and depressed?"

Patient: "Add to Cart."

Therapist: "NO!"

The meme, of course was meant to be funny. But there is more truth in it than we care to admit.  

With the way things are, we can't just go to the store the way we used to.  It's an adventure now. Masks, gloves, wrapping yourself in clear-wrap and the like. Then they only allow a certain number to people to enter at any one time and you are stuck in the cold, or the heat (Vegas in the Summer) waiting your turn to go in and try to maintain 6 feet between you and every other human being in the store.  UGH! 

So, society has embraced online shopping more than ever.  It is a good thing, you can get anything you want from the safety of your own home. Or is it?  We are forced into solitude and isolation by the rules. (You may insert your own rant here...I will keep my thoughts to myself). Humans by nature are not solitary creatures. We thrive on relationships and human contact. We need to feel the touch of a friend, have a shoulder to literally cry on, or just sit in a room and talk to each other.  Facetime, Zoom, Messaging, all that is fine to a point, but none of that replaces the human contact that is genetic to human beings.  (Or any animal that is not a solitary hunter).  

So, we hole up in our caves and try to replace that need with buying crap. Hey, don't get me wrong, I get a lot of stuff on line now instead of going to the Mart. Essentials. Stuff I would get on a daily basis. If I don't need t today, I can prime my way to delivery tomorrow. 

I am, of course talking about the online shopping experience that involves hours of boredom-scrolling through your shopping platform(s) of choice and buying on impulse. Things you would never think to buy or even want to buy if you were out in the shopping wild.  We justify it by saying to ourselves I am not doing anything else, why not treat myself to a.....(fill in useless thing you will never use here). 

Admittedly,  I have done my share of this too, but never to excess. I may think I need a new computer keyboard that lights up, buy it, and low an behold, I am typing on it now. Did I need it? Not really. But it is something I justify because I actually wanted it and did a search for it. Pre-meditated shopping! 

Only you can decide what is ADD TO CART binge shopping to fill a void in your life. But like anything else, admitting you are doing it is the first step. Only you can be your own shopping police. Be aware, be conscious of what you are doing and why. Get up, walk around and think Do I really need or want this thing before you ADD TO CART.  You might even save a little money!

You might do one more add to cart and order my book. The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

Available on Amazon and Nook, iBooks and other e readers.

Have a great day!

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The Clock is Ticking

 So, Here is a thought for you. Procrastination sucks. 

Time is all there is in the NOW, and it seems to go by faster the older we get. Being in my sixth decade, I cannot believe how fast it goes by. It seem like the minute you get the Christmas lights down, you have to turn around and put them up again. 

When we were kids, time dragged on. School days lasted for hours on end, and the only time it seemed that time sped up was either when you had a paper due, or you were out playing and had to come in.  The big difference is that as you grow older, you become more aware of the time. You begin to deal with schedules. You have appointments. You have kids that are in sports, you have a job, you have a family, and suddenly time just accelerates and you "have no time to do anything but what you have to do." 

I have a daily planner as most organized people do. I have had to get into the habit of actually using it. I know everyone of you has started the year with a planner, sat down with good intentions, and at the end of the year, January is nicely filled out, then nothing except birthdays and anniversaries that you filled in the first day that you had it.  Do yourself a favor and use your planner. Along with the appointments and the stuff you have to do, block out a time during each day to not do anything, and stick to it. It does not have to be a huge amount of time, just a time every day around your other stuff to hang out with yourself. 

I sell cars, so my days are spent full on waiting for the next customer to walk in or on the phone trying to generate the next buyer. So when I am at work, I try to be productive with my time. I also block out a little time during each day to decompress. Even if it's only 15 minutes. On my days off, I do stuff with my wife, but there is always a me time  block there to just be with me.  I like to take short naps in the afternoon on my days off. I always have time to do that, because it recharges my spirit and body. Napping is not wasting time, it is a necessary time to let the body slow down. There has been much research done on the benefits of napping, and many large corporations encourage a 15 -20 minute power nap which has been shown to increase productivity. 

But let's get back to the main point of time. We cannot get time back. Procrastination is a killer. We tend to procrastinate over the things we don't like to do. Doing taxes, cleaning house, seeing the doctor or dentist, emptying the cat box. All things that if left for later  can turn bad. We would rather just sit around on the computer, or watch TV or do anything other than what needs to be done. And funny enough, once you do get the stuff done, a lot of the time you will ask yourself, why didn't I do that sooner?  

Budget your time. It goes by fast. My wife was raised by British parents, and over the last 20 years with her, we have never missed tea time. It is a great habit, because it makes you slow down and take a break from the day. In Mexico, they have mid day siesta. Very smart. Anything to break the stress of the day up. You need to find your own way to break the day up and take time for just you. You will find that your stress levels will drop a lot!

I cover this in my book,  The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.   

Here is an excerpt from the chapter "There is no Present Like the Time"

*******************************************************

How much time do we waste doing … whatever...?  We have to sleep, we have to eat, we have to work.  In this day and age, we have to check our email, we have to look at Facebook (to see what all our thousands of friends are doing). I suppose if you took a stopwatch, and timed all the things that distract you, you would be amazed, no, GOBSMACKED by how much time you devote to useless, aimless distractions.  We all do.  And, as the technology gets more advanced, we will continue to divert our creativity to the tiny micro-processors in our devices. We will, in a sense, become the BORG. Like in Star Trek, Next Generation. All of us part human, part machine, run by one group conscious in our wearable tech.  Look around you.  How many people do you see with their heads in their smart phone or smart watch? A little scary, huh? Now, let’s just play with some hypothetical numbers.

 

Say the average guy or gal spends 1 hour on their phone a day doing useless, mindless crap.  Now let’s insert that into a business setting that has, say 50 people working there. Already you see that there is 50 hours a day of lost production.  Over a 5-day work week, that would be 250 hours a week of lost production.  Let’s say each person makes 20.00 per hour.  That comes to $5,000.00 a week that the company is spending on people doing meaningless stuff on their phone. ($260,000 a year). That's a lot of money spent for people to play silly games, or comment on someone's restaurant choice.

***********************************************************************************

That is, or course, a rather simple example, but you get the point.

Time and Tide wait for no man. - Geoffrey Chaucer

It is a fact that we are only here in this incarnation for a very short time. A blip on the evolutionary clock. It is only common sense, then, to make the best of that time and not fritter it away.  Balance your time wisely and you will find you get more done and feel better about yourself. Have a wonderful day. 

Links to my book

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How Important Is It?

 We all get stressed over all kinds of stuff.  Getting stressed or angry over things that you think affect your life, whether they do or not, is a waste of time and energy. 

It goes back to not letting stuff rent space in your brain. When something gets you to the point of boiling over, or your head exploding, 💥 you have to ask one simple question to put it all in perspective.  How Important is IT?  Trust me, a lot of the stuff that gets you to that point is never as bad as you think it is. 

Perception is important.  If you perceive something to be terrible, or give it the importance to ruin your day or your week, IT WILL.  Asking How Important is It gives the you a chance to rate the problem.

Rate it on a scale of 1 to 10 with one being not terribly bothersome  to 10 being  If I don't do something about this someone could get hurt... 

An example of a "1" would be when you get your favorite coffee from take out and they get the order wrong.  Now, you can go in and make an ass out of yourself yelling a screaming, and accomplish nothing,  OR you can ask, How Important is It? Drink it the way it is and go on with your day.  Or, go back in and politely inform them that they got you order wrong. They will take care of it with a smile most of the time, and everyone is a winner. DON'T CALL 911. (Trust me...it happens). 

I used to close my morning radio show with the phrase "Don't sweat the small stuff, It's all small stuff..."  It's true. No matter how insurmountable something seems, there is always an answer. Sometimes the answer may not be the answer YOU had in mind, but there is ALWAYS an answer. That which does not kill me makes me stronger." --Friedrich Nietzsche

Always score stuff on How Important is it?  It puts a lot of things into proper perspective. Any artist will tell you, If the perspective is off, even just a little it throws the whole painting out of whack, The same goes for every day "problems".

The more ZEN you can be about things, the better off you are. Call it self control, internal anger management, or just letting go and letting God. Much of what happens with us is by divine plan. It has nothing to do with religion, the divine plan is what the universe has already put into play.  I does not mean to throw your hands up and just let it happen. The divine always needs help and effort. The divine does not write anything in stone. It is always changing. Like the stock market. Some days are better than others. It's like surfing. Ride the wave. If you fall, another wave will be along.  It's all part of the plan. The eternal now. Stay in the present. 

Check out my book. The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

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Be A Teacher

 Be a Teacher.  Pass on what you know. In other words, allow others to learn from you. Being a teacher does not necessarily mean you must sit people down and lecture to them about your opinions or beliefs.  That is not really teaching.  It is a different thing if you are a seminar speaker, or doing actual formal classes.  When I speak of being a teacher, teach by example. Answer questions rather than offering unsolicited advice.  Let them come to you. When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Trying to teach anyone who is not ready is a waste of time and energy on both parts. 

Do not under any circumstances try to fake teaching something you do not know.  I know a lot of people who try to guide others and don't have a clue what they are saying. The blind leading the blind as it were. If someone comes to you seeking answers, sometimes the correct answer is "I'm sorry, I don't know".  You don't have to be a Guru.  No one will think less of you if you don't know. If you fake it, then you are just a snake oil salesman. 

Put ego aside, and allow people to learn from you. If I ask you, "What is the meaning of life? Maybe will you say "It is simple. You just be good to people and you will be happy..." That, of course is YOUR meaning (of life).  When I am asked a question like that, I may answer, "What does it mean to you?"  Ninety Percent of questions people ask they already know the answers to. They just have to be reminded that they already know it. 

Part of being a teacher to to always be a student. No one has all the answers. Wisdom comes from a conglomeration of different inputs. 

Zen Masters learn from many teachers. ZEN is not a religion. It is a series of understandings that lead to inner peace and understanding of all that which is around you. Always learn, Do not judge, do not let your ego lead you to thinking that you know everything. We have the knowledge inside us, but until we awaken the knowledge, we do not have it consciously. 

The same goes for being spiritual vs religious. I am not going to cheer for one side or the other.  Religious people believe one way, one truth. Spiritual people may have several beliefs based on several religions. They are, really two sides of the same coin.  Jesus, Buddah, Mohammed, (Obi Wan Kenobi) were all amazing teachers. When it comes down to it, we all want to treated by others the way we would treat them. TEACH goodness by example. Everything else will fall into place.

Please order and read my book: The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

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God Bless and Pass on what you know.

If It Is Renting Too Much Space In Your Brain...Evict It!

 I had a coworker say to me, after a particularly frustrating day in car sales, "Don't let those people rent space in your brain for one more minute." 

I've held on to that over the years and have used that analogy many times. Whether it's coworkers, customers, relatives, or even things posted on Facebook or Twitter. If you take stuff on board and let it rent space in your brain that could be used for other things, you need to evict it!

The media, for all the cool stuff that's out there, is a perfect example of a vehicle that plants things in our mind and then keeps it in front of us. Even if we don't want to obsess over something, the media forces us to by keeping it in front of our face all the time. Whether it's politics, health, covid-19, vaccinations, how horrible things are in general, whatever it may be. We're in a society where forced obsession is the way of things, and it can be very scary. It's very hard to just let all of that go... but it can be done. 

If you can meditate or get inside yourself and center your being to where you can shut out all of the negative influences coming into your mind, you will find it much easier to let go of these things that you obsess about.

One thing you can do, is not watch the news or surf the internet... Facebook, Twitter, all those things where these negative influences come into your brain right before bed.

 The mind has a way, as you know if you've ever suffered from insomnia, of having everything in the world cave in on your brain all at once in the middle of the night. For some reason, that is the ultimate time to worry about shit. I have literally woken up in the middle of the night and thought about stuff to worry about that I would never think about during daylight hours. It's amazing the stuff that your mind can come up with. I try to tell it to stop thinking about it, and of course I start thinking about the fact that I'm not thinking about the thing I don't want to think about. It is, a vicious cycle.

There are many good meditations websites out there. But really all you need to do is find a good piece of meditation music on your music player, start it, close your eyes for 20 minutes and just concentrate on the music or the sounds of nature that are playing. If you find your mind wavering just bring it back to your main thought of "I am meditating nothing else is coming into my brain other than the music or the sounds of nature." There are a lot of guided meditations out there. I use the ones by Deepak Chopra a lot. 

I've heard it said many times that the brain cannot think two thoughts at the same time. If you're anything like me, your brain tries very hard to disprove that theory. Again meditation, zeroing in on one thought, one color in your mind, one sound of nature, will help you to get rid of all of those thoughts that are hammering into your consciousness. 

I heard a speaker in AA once referred to the thoughts in your brain as the committee. The committee will always try to convince you one way or another. Think of it as a bunch of old guys in white powdered wigs sitting across from each other and arguing why something is good and why it is not good. The committee will be the first to tell you why you should do something that's bad for you, and why you shouldn't do something that's good for you. I talk about the committee a lot in my book The self-help book for people who hate self-help books. 

Don't get these confused with voices in your head because that is a clinical diagnosis for a much deeper problem. Every human being has thoughts racing around that we seemingly have no control over. The only thing we can do is try to override those thoughts with other, hopefully better thoughts. 

Again you're not going to achieve this on the first day of rushing into doing a meditation. It will gradually, over several days or weeks, first become a habit, and become easier as you go along because you learn how to focus on the now. Remember that living in the now is the key to serenity and keeping yourself from obsessing over things that are beyond your control.

Please follow these links to my book The Self-Help book for people who hate self-help books. It's available on Amazon and also through nook, iBooks, and several other e-readers by clicking the link below. Have a wonderful day.

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I understand that you are so concerned about me, but...

      I posted something on Facebook recently and was "Put in my place" by people I don't even know. Trolls, maybe. But here is the thing. Why are you, a person who knows nothing about me, so concerned about my opinions, feelings or beliefs.  

     It is almost like you  have a resentment because you have a resentment against me for making you have a resentment against me... filling your mind with shit that isn't any of your business in the first place. It's like a double secret resentment. It's like being mad at me for making you mad at me. It makes no sense.  😕

    Instead of being so concerned about the way other people are, even people you don't know, perhaps one should examine why you are reacting the way they do. Is this a need to try to change someone's way of thinking? Is it misdirected concern that if someone thinks differently than you that their world will come crashing in on them? Or, maybe it is a mechanism to verify to yourself that you are right and they are wrong.  OR maybe is is simply a co-dependent reaction to try to fix people. 

    Co-dependency has many many faces.  YOU are not responsible for making someone happy, or making them think the way you do. No matter how right you may think you are, there are people who will not agree with that, or even will set out to, or worse yet, prove you wrong. There is a lot of that going on in society now. The best you can do is just try to detach yourself from the craziness. The truth is, the masses don't care what you think or post on FB. That goes for me, you, everyone. Not everyone agrees with what I write here. That's ok, I do not care. I am not trying to change anyone's mind. I am just an idea starter. A couple of good ways to take yourself out of the fray: Quit watching the news for a couple of days.  Avoid the temptation to make a snarky comment on FB just to be part of the crowd. I call it HERD ASSHOLISM.  Do research before you start telling people how to be or think. Then don't tell them anything!  Nothing is worse than someone who is uninformed informing you how to be.

Here's an idea, check out my book  The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

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Have a GREAT DAY!

 

THE EVER PRESENT 'WHAT IFs"

 What if...What if...What if...I cover this a lot in my book.  

The WHAT IFs can be a very time consuming and brain wracking thing.  It goes straight back to not living for today. Worrying about the things you can't change. Again, I address that in my book The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books.

(From Chapter 2)

We as human beings being human always wonder what if?  What if I had gone to college? What if I hadn't gone to college?  What if I had married my High School sweetheart? What if I HADN’T married my High School Sweetheart?  What if this, what if that?  Truth is, there are no right answers, and second guessing yourself at every turn serves no purpose.  It leads to self-doubt and lack of true happiness. 

 

True happiness is the realization that life happens every day and you have the choice to be part of it, or to sit on the sidelines watching it, afraid to take part because the outcome is uncertain.  You have no doubt heard the old saying, “The only certainty in life is death and taxes”.  (And, of course the certainty that unless you live under a rock, everything you say and do ends up online somewhere. Again, I will discuss this later, because it is a powerful influence on how we do things).  I do car sales right now in my life. It is a commission only business.  I am always under the gun to hit quota, make as much as I can this month because you never know what will happen next month.  It is not for the weak of heart and spirit. Scared the heck out of me when I started.  Today I may be sweating how the mortgage is going to be paid because I didn't sell anything and in less than 24 hours I may have made enough to pay 4 months ahead.  Another movie reference comes to mind. (And I will use a LOT of them throughout this book). Tom Hanks in the movie Cast Away was able to get off the island because the storm provided half a porta potty  that he then used as a sail for his raft. Once back in civilization again, he took on a whole new view of life.  He took some chances because on any given day “You never know what the tide will bring in... I guess you need to just step out of the comfort zone and set your focus on letting things happen the way they are supposed to and let go of micro-managing every single tiny thing in your life. See what the tide will bring in. There are times you just need to not give a damn.

It is entirely okay to think about the future and make plans, but do not obsess about outcomes. The sooner one learns to let go of outcomes, the better off your stress level becomes. Lower stress leads to better health. 

For instance, the current social environment is full of what if moments. What if I get Covid? What If I get the vaccine? What if I don't? What if I have a reaction? What if I don't have a reaction. It is really truly enough to make you crazy, and make you sick. The FIRST thing is to try to not change someone else's outcome.  If, for instance, you have an strong opinion about something, let's say getting a flu shot, and you believe fully in doing that, and have a friend who is against it, trying to force them into your way of thinking is usually futile. What if I don't get the shot and get the flu? The other side of it is what if you don't get the shot and don't get the flu?

Life is a crap shoot. A hand of Poker, one hit at the blackjack table... what if  I hit on 15 and bust. What if I hit on 15 and get a 6? What if I hold and the dealer has 14 and busts? The casino is the center of the universe for What IFs! You can what if you entire life savings into oblivion if you are not careful. 

Bottom Line...Don't worry about outcomes. Just make decisions on the facts you have in front of you and take your best guess, because really, life is just a series of best guesses. 

For more, check out my book! Available on:

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INHALE, EXHALE, REPEAT AS NECESSARY

 

In trying times, sometimes we forget that all we have to do to get through the day is inhale, exhale, repeat as necessary! We have to remind ourselves sometimes that getting worked up about things that are beyond our control is futile and a huge waste of energy.  

    It can be as simple as the person in front of you in traffic not going fast enough (which of course is not in your realm of control) or yelling about the price of gas or groceries. Don't get me wrong, you should vent your frustrations because keeping it all in can also lead to anxiety and and anger. BUT you can vent by calmly talking about it, or, of course, use the Serenity Prayer:

God Grant Me The Serenity

To Accept The Things I Cannot Change,

Courage To Change The Things I Can,

And The Wisdom To Know The Difference

    Even if you don't believe in a higher power (God), this will give you a minute to take a breath and re-center. 

    Another thing that helps is actually inhaling while counting slowly to 5, hold the breath for 5 and exhale while counting to 5. That is 15 seconds that you are not thinking about being pissed off. If you are still upset, do it again. (the repeat as necessary...see what I did there?)

    This simple thing will help you calm yourself, and believe it or not will help you make logical decisions.

    I sell cars. When I show people how much a car is going to cost, or what the payment is, and they catch their breath, (stop breathing) I will tell them...Okay, inhale, exhale, repeat as necessary. They think it's a humorous thing I am saying to lighten things up, and in a way I am. BUT I am also letting them know that there is no reason to panic. JUST BREATHE....

    It is, as a matter of fact, easier said than done.  No one expects you to be calm all the time. If you can catch yourself just one time today, a couple of times tomorrow and a few more times the next day, you will find that very soon  you will quit reacting as emotionally as you might today.  People remark to me about how level I am most of the time. Because I have over time learned to apply this simple thing to pretty much everything in my life. Don't get me wrong. I do fly off the handle and get pissed. But WAY less than I used to. As a result, people I know don't like to upset me. (no one can make me mad. Mad is a reaction to another person) They know if they push me to that point it will be ugly. I don't like to show people that side, so I just Inhale, Exhale, repeat as necessary.

Please check out my book, The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books. Available on Amazon, and other readers. 

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Keep Coming Back

A follow up to my 2019 blog ....life with type 2 Diabetes

 

Hello. Part of this new blog has been looking back at stuff I have written before. This, then, is a follow-up from a post in April of 2019 when I found out I had type 2 diabetes.  The original post got a lot of views, and I got great feedback from many people who found themselves going through the same thing I was going through. 

Here, then, is the original post followed up by what is going on today.  A little self help for diabetics....

My First Month of getting control of Type 2 Diabetes

I write about all kinds of stuff here, but rarely do I discuss personal or health issues.  I feel, though, that it is time to share they ways I am dealing with type 2 diabetes.

Having talked to a lot of people about this, I find that almost everyone I know is 'Pre-Diabetic'.  I was also told this about 2 years ago.  I figured I would lose weight, exercise and cut way back on my sugar intake.  At that time my glucose test came back in the mid 100s.  Not great.  I did well for a couple of days, and then blew it off.  Pre meant I was not there yet.  Then, I had labs done in March of this year and my glucose was at 260 and my A1c was 7.4 ... At that point I called my doctor and started getting pro active.   I hated hearing her say that I had full blown Type 2 Diabetes.  It was a serious wake up call and I needed to heed the warning. 

The first thing was the medication. Metformin twice a day.  The scary thing about that was reading the side effects.  Severe gastro intestinal discomfort, gas, serious runs, and cramps. The very worst of anti-social behavior. I took the meds and waited for the worst.  Nothing happened.  I was one of the lucky ones.  To this day, I have no  bad reaction to the Metformin. 

Next on the agenda was to lose weight. That meant a drastic change of diet.  Being in Auto Sales, one tends to eat whatever they can whenever they can.  It's a terrible thing to do to your body.  I think the choices we have in fast food nowadays is tantamount to just eating poison . Some of the taco fast food places can't even tell you what the "Meat Product" the put in their taco is. True Mystery Meat. So, I had to adjust what I ate IN A BIG WAY.  No sugar, no white carbs, a little dark chocolate (90%) and less dairy. 

I swore I would never give up my milk, so I found a brand called Fair Life which is lactose free, half the sugar and organic. One 8 oz glass is fine and I am happy.  Also, Mulberry and Cinnamon from the health food store. One of those a day, and 600mg Alpha Lipoic Acid if you have toe tingling. I got a glucose meter and tracked my readings 2x a day to show my doctor in my follow up. She was pleased that my numbers were down over 100 points 1 month after starting my new AD (After Diabetes) life.  I have shed about 16 pounds and completely changed my diet.  I must say my wife, Nikki, was a HUGE part of this too.  It takes a ton of prep time to eat healthy. She jumped in with both feet and she too has shed some pounds. 

After the first month I feel great. More energy, I can put on my socks and breathe at the same time....Kinda nice.  

It is an ongoing process.  But, I have taken a do or die (literally) attitude regarding this issue.  I have been sober now for 35 years, and quit smoking about 18 years ago.  This is the same thing. It makes no sense to me to load my body up with all this crap.  And it is not easy to avoid sugars. High fructose corn syrup is in everything from Ketchup to salad dressing. Start reading labels. If there is fructose corn syrup, you might as well replace that with the words Rat Poison.  It is my belief, since I started researching all this stuff, that the dramatic rise in type 2 diabetes is in direct proportion to the amount of processed foods humans eat.  There are alternatives to these things. Even so called Health foods are not. Become a label reader.  Things you think are okay are NOT. White rice, corn on the cob, every kind of fruit juice and energy drinks are full of sugars. It will shock you.

Anyway, I am on a new journey, and I will keep you updated.

Have a great (Sugar free) Day!

So NOW, February 2021, after trying to stay within the bounds of my diet, I did end up letting go of about 35 pounds and bringing my A1c down to 5.4 which is in normal range.  NOW, to be fair, I have put on about 8 pounds since then, and my last bloodwork came back at a 5.5 which is still pretty normal. I still take Metformin (Which I have also heard has anti aging properties) and still watch my sugars and carbs, although I could get a little more strict with myself. 

My point is, that type 2 does not have to be a sentence for doom and worse to come. Like anything else, it does take a lot of determination and goal setting.  I talk about goal setting in my book, The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books. I had to go at it like I went at staying clean and sober.  If I don't do something about it, I will die young. Pretty good motivator for me. 

Have a great day and remember you can order my book The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books here....

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Bumper Sticker Therapy Pt. 1

 

    I spend a lot of time in the car and see a lot of bumper stickers. Some clever, some funny, some just stupid, but many of them provoke thought.

    In the movie 28 Days, Sandra Bullock plays a woman in Rehab who really does not want to be there. At one point she is meeting with her counselor, and he gives her some advise. (It was a slogan for AA) and she asked him to quit talking like a bumper sticker. There are many "bumper sticker" slogans in AA, and they all go deeper than the words. One Day At A Time, Easy Does It, Live and Let Live, Let Go And Let God just to quote a few. To someone in the program, it is a sign that the person in the car, or someone in that family is in a 12 step program. When you wave at them at the next red light, most of the time they know why and will wave back. 

    Here is a story that happened to me many years ago. I had been in AA for about a year and a half, and was on a road trip to find a radio job as a morning DJ. My journey took me to Phoenix, Arizona.  Now, in the early 80s Phoenix was a city easy to get lost in. It was about 110 degrees, my interview did not go as I had hoped, and I could not for the life of me find my way out of town. I was sitting at a red light and the guy behind me tooted his horn. My initial reaction was to flip him off because the light was red. My other thoughts were to find a bar close by and re-examine my sobriety.  The light turned green and off I shot. At the next light, the car behind pulled up beside me. He tooted his horn and rolled the passenger window down. I was about as pissed as I could be, and about to lose control on him when he said, "Hey, I saw your bumper sticker (ONE DAY AT A TIME) and see you are from out of state. I'm going to a meeting two blocks from here...you want to come along?" 

    I did, and he and I remained friends until his death 16 years later. 

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     ONE DAY AT A TIME:  Means just that. We take every day as it comes. We quit worrying about yesterday and tomorrow. Today, right now is all that matters. We can't undo what happened 10 seconds ago or what will happen 10 seconds from now. Focus on what you can do in the present NOW.  

    EASY DOES IT:  Another 12 step piece of advise. To ME it means don't over complicate things.  As human beings being human, many of us can escalate the simplest thing into an absolute pile of crap.  It can be the interpretation of something someone says or texts to you, a post on Facebook, a Tweet, whatever.  Take a breath. Easy Does it, Mate. Even if something WAS said in hate or anger, rise above it and wipe it off. It's ego reacting to these things. If you are real and true to yourself, nothing like that should affect you to the point of lashing out. Another saying is AA is probably the one I live by the most. WHAT YOU THINK OF ME IS NONE OF MY BUSINESS. Pretty self-explanatory.

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Some that are NOT in the 12 step programs include Shit Happens...Yes, as a matter of fact it does, but it's all the way you look at it.  In my book The Self Help Book for People Who Hate Self Help Books I tell the story of the bird flying south long after all his friends left. While flying over Wyoming, it got very cold and the bird fell from the sky, frozen and unable to move.  A cow walked by and pooped on him. The warmth of the poop allowed the bird to thaw and be began to flutter about. The barn cat saw him fluttering and grabbed him and ate him. The moral being, those who shit on you may not be the enemy, and those who pull you out of shit may not be your friend. 

HAVE A NICE DAY: I really don't like that one much. It's a bit bossy for my liking. Is it HAVE a nice day? Have a NICE day or Have a nice DAY? Only one day?  Have a NICE day? How about if I want to have a phenomenal day?  Quit telling me what to do!!  (OK...Easy Does IT)..

ANYTHING POLITICAL!! NO NO NO. You are asking for arguments and keyed cars. 

And WHO THE HELL DOES THIS??

OH well. We all have our ways of expressing ourselves. (Live and Let Live) Some of us Blog, and some stick bumper-stickers on every inch of rear real-estate of their vehicles. 

SO, as you drive, and see a thought provoking bumper sticker, take a minute and think about what it means to YOU in your mind. 

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GOD BLESS and Remember, Inhale, Exhale, Repeat as Necessary!