Wow...Holidays are HERE!

I didn't think it had been this long since I last wrote.  I have been busy finishing my book which we will E publish soon.  I have also been working a lot on my KIA blog.  Too much to do, never enough time to do it all. Which brings me to today's idea.  The Holidays are HERE! Thanksgiving was last week... here....gone.... Christmas is now upon us!  We are a bit desensitized because, after all, a lot of the stores have been green and red since mid October.  I did hear Christmas music in the first week of November this year. Wow.  

So, now you had your family in for a huge gathering last Thursday. In 1 month you get to do it all again.  It's too much!!! No one has time in 1 tiny month to do anything new that you can talk about around the dinner table at Christmas. So you get stuck hearing all the same stories that you heard at Thanksgiving...

Having family stay with you is tough.  You get so used to your routine and suddenly you are cooking for twice as many, (Stuff you would not normally cook), watching movies your houseguests want to watch, and just totally wonking up your daily routine in general.  By day three, it's like an episode of the Twilight Zone. Rod Serling standing in the corner of the room with a cigarette in his hand and that choppy cadence in his voice reminding you that there is no leftover gravy in The Twilight Zone!

Here are a few tips for surviving Holiday Guests. 

1. Remember...YOU invited them (most of the time)  If you dive into a pool of sharks, knowing there are sharks there, that's on you!

2. Wait to do your Christmas shopping. That way, while the Family is there, you have an excuse to get out for a couple of hours by yourself, hence a bit of peace and quiet. 

3. Practice breathing. When you get frustrated just inhale...exhale...repeat as necessary. 

4. Remember the definition of insanity...doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different outcome.  Maybe THIS year try inviting less people, or better yet, go to their house and annoy them for a change.

5. Send love to those who annoy you. Remember, they are your teachers. 

6. Look for the gift. If your folks are older, you may not be able to spend Christmas with them next year. And believe me, once they are gone, you will wish they could be there. 

7. Watch Christmas Vacation.  The Griswalds can teach you a few things. Like thank goodness Cousin Eddy belongs to them and not you. 

Happy Holidays / Merry Christmas / Happy Hanukkah / may you be blessed in whatever manner you celebrate. 

Happy Mother's Day

I called my Mom this morning to wish her Happy Mother's day.  We talk every other day or so anyway, so there was not a whole lot to "catch up on".  She said something though that struck me.  We live a couple of states away, so we don't see each other on Mother's Day, and she said it was sad because of that fact.  I told her at that point, that we really should not have a day every year that forces us to remind ourselves that Moms are great. We would not BE HERE without her!  Every time you see your mom or talk to her should be Mother's day. Just like every day that you live to see another sunrise with your spouse should be Valentine's day.  And Christmas...you get the point.

Anyway, I will keep this short since you have to call Mom today.  For those departed Moms, there will always be time to say a little prayer...Happy Mothers Day to all the Moms everywhere!!

Have a Great Day!

Remember this when you look at ALL YOUR FRIENDS on Facebook...

I am currently writing a book. I have been working on it for quite a long time, because it's the kind of thing you have to write when the mood hits you, and you have a great thread of thought...much like a blog. It's a chance you take that anyone will be interested in what you have to say.  I enjoy writing, and I hope to someday E publish this book. If one person reads it and it helps them, then it was worth taking the time to do. 

The book is called The Self Help Book For People Who Hate Self Help Books (c)2016..... 

I have read a ton of self help books, some great, some not so...but most have one thing in common. They are written by people that have a lot of letters after their names. All good...not dissing anyone. I am writing mine from just years of observation and experience. I would like to share one of the chapters with you here, just because social media is such a thing now. We are get pulled into the Facebook Rabbit Hole. So here we go. This chapter from the book is called: 

But I Have 4627 Friends on Facebook

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Okay. Take a DEEP breath. All but about 12 of these people are not your friends. Maybe a few more or less. Go through your "Friends" on Face Book and write down the ones you would trust your kids, Dog or Spouse with. Who can you call as a house sitter if you have to go out of town? Yup. Short list. Multiply all this by the number of friends on Twitter, Voxer, Snap Chat Yadda Yadda Yadda and you still end up with about 12. So why are you sharing you most personal stuff with total strangers? And why do they think you really care about what they eat every 42 minutes? It's really gotten out of hand. Okay, so I am an entertainer. I have a couple of Face Book pages. I think I have a total of about 2500 "Friends" between the two pages. I perform and send invites to everyone. I figure asses in seats means ticket sales. But, at lets say, Christmas Time, if I want to send out a personal greeting to people on my pages, there are only MAYBE 30 people that I feel I know well enough to invade their personal space. And some of them are iffy. Don't let the number of "Friends" you have in cyber space lull you into a false sense of being all that. We are really not that important to anyone but ourselves. We measure our success in terms of likes, shares and comments. We have all done it. We have liked some crap on Facebook that we didn't spend more than a 10^th of a second looking at because the person is our “Friend” and we want all his “Friends” to see that I am his “Friend”...What a crock. In the great scheme of things, it's meaningless. There is no personal contact. It's an illusion that we have all these friends that we “Connect” with when we sitting at home in our underwear at 2 AM looking at our Facebook page because we have forgotten how to really communicate.

When something goes wrong and we put it on Facebook or instagram or Twitter, whatever your social media of choice, we get responses of condolence, prayers, advise, whatever from all these people we don't know. But how many of them are responding because they are really praying for you, and how many are just doing it because you had 231 other people do it and they want to feel like they are part of the collective conscience. That's all good and well if they actually say a prayer for you. How many times have YOU said someone was in your prayers and never thought about them again??

As a sales person, I sit and hand write 5 to 10 cards a day to clients that have bought cars from me. People I work with are astounded by this. That someone can actually sit down, with a pen and a blank card and envelope and write...in your own handwriting mind you.....a couple of sentences to another human being. It does not involve a keyboard, an e mail address or a data plan. It's olden days stuff. I actually had someone ask, “What do you do? Mail it?” It's a damned shame. It's a shame that these guys are missing out. I get calls from these clients thanking me for taking the time...(2 minutes) out of my day to think about them. Oh, and they come in and buy another car.

I have all my clients in an e mail database, I have a ton of them on Facebook, and yes it would save a lot of time and postage to just bulk email a big “How have you been” to 400 people at the same time. But, it's just another email. Lost in 50 others they just got. But when someone goes out and opens the mail box and there, nestled among the bills and junk is a bright blue envelope, with their name and address hand written upon it, well, That's special. Someone once said, If you can count your friends on both hands, you can count your REAL friends on just one hand, and out of those 5, maybe two are true friends. Be careful who you share your thoughts, loves, fears and food pictures with. All of it will be in cyber space, uh, FOREVER!

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Hope you got something out of that. I hope to be done with the whole thing sometime this year!

Have a Great Day!

Don't Worry..You are not in control of anything..........

Each day the human mind spends over 70% of it's time over thinking and worrying.  That's a hell of a lot of time thinking about stuff that has not happened yet. 

Worry is one of the strongest "fear" emotions we have. We lose sleep, we have night sweats, we tend to think in worst case scenarios.  And it can drive us to the nut house in a hurry.  

The thing is, though, that if you look back on all the time you spent worrying about stuff, and the eventuality that the stuff you worried about never happened, what would you do with all that time that you wasted letting your brain take you hostage?  If the 70% number is true, then you spend 265 days a year worrying about stuff.  Over, say an 80 year life span, that 20,440 days, or 490,560 hours where you could be using your brain for something else. 

Life is short. We have no time for herding cats.  

The purpose of life is to be happy- Dalai Lama

We live in a world where the media works very hard to instill fear in us. Turn on the news and tell me how many happy stories do you hear in an hour?  Don't get me wrong, the world is not what it used to be. We have threats everywhere. We always have, but now we have a media that can bring it to us in real time in 4K high Def.  Our serenity is being attacked on all fronts. Here are some ways to deal with all this. 


Meditate. Get into being one with your consciousness.  Sit quietly and put processed thoughts out of your head. Concentrate of the sounds around you. The wind, the rain, the sound of the fly in the room. Live in the experience of now. Don't let the outside world allow your mind to wander.  If you hear a plane, or a fire truck, or a dog barking in the distance, just accept it as what is instead of letting your mind go somewhere else.  15 minutes a day. Not easy, but with practice, you can get it.

Don't watch the news for long periods. .... We all need to know what is going on, but don't leave the news on in the background all day while you are pottering around the house.  Watch the headlines, and get on with your day. Half the time, the news just pisses you off anyway, then you have to deal with anger too. 

Stay off facebook for a day every week. OR set a no information time.  Turn off from social media. Give it a rest. The world will continue to turn if you wait a day to like someone's post.

Sometimes, leave your phone at home.  Before cell phones, we went along our merry way, and when we got home, we had an answering machine.  We dealt with stuff then. As a result we saw more of the world around us.

Watch cartoons. No, seriously.  Who can have a shitty day after watching Bugs, or Daffy, or the Flintstones....Great old cartoons are a way to get back to a simpler time.  It really does take your mind off stuff. I believe if more adults watched cartoons once in a while, the world would be a better place. 

Go for a walk. See the world around you. (A good time to keep your phone at home) It's a beautiful place, remember?

And last but not least,  Don't worry..You are not in control of anything. 

Merry Christmas

TO GROUP OR NOT TO GROUP...LEAVE ME OUTTA THIS

With the advent of modern technology, the chain letter was replaced by the chain email which was replaced with the chain Facebook post which has been replaced by the chain text. 

You know, the text where you are included with 65 other people wanting to have you reply or comment to everything from Boxer or Briefs, to political views, to saying Amen, Drinks at Bob's who's in?.... to countless situations...about this time of year you will be getting group texts about Cornbread or Rye Bread Stuffing...Merry Christmas or Happy Holidays...Turkey or Tofu...So and So is having a party, rsvp...yadda yadda yadda...

Point is, I don't mind getting a text from anyone about anything. My phone pings and I look at it, and at that point decide to respond or ignore.  My bug bear is when I have to listen to my phone ping half a dozen times in a 2 minute period because everyone else is responding to the sender, and being part of the group, it is assumed that I give a crap about what everyone else thinks.  "Text me back or you are not my friend..."  What is this? Third grade?  Here's a thought....Friends don't send friends stupid group texts!" 

So, about now, dear reader, you are saying, just delete it and unjoin the thread.  I have enough threads in my life that I should not HAVE to unjoin something that I did not join in the first place.  There are times that group texts are easier for sharing things. At work, Everyone gets a daily sales report group texted to them. Fine. Necessary and expected. But when someone asked a question on that thread and everyone starts answering it's a pain in the ass. ding...ding...dingdingdingding....

It's part of life, can't be avoided, so, feel free to group text all you want, but don't feel bad if I don't reply. 

While we are on the subject of annoying text messages, What is up with all this invasive advertising on your phone now?  I can't go to Walmart, Home Depot, Bed Bath and Beyond or even McDonalds without my phone pinging, and a text ad saying you are at Walmart...look at these specials...Again, I could shut off my location access but WHY SHOULD I HAVE TO DO THAT??? Any thoughts?  We will address this at another time.

Have a great day.

And so it begins..................

With a week and a half until Thanksgiving, we got it out of the way today.  My brother in law and his wife are here visiting from Canada.  The timing of their trip made it easier to have turkey and all the fixins' today.  My wife and I will then use this T-day credit, and do NOTHING on Thanksgiving day but sit at home in our jammies and watch the Macy's parade.  (I will admit it was strange to cook a full blown Thanksgiving day dinner (Complete with pie and naps) and not have the parade on.  Maybe I will DVR it this year so if by chance I find myself in a similar situation next Fall, I can watch it again. That all said, I guess my family has officially kicked off the Holiday Season.  Ho Ho Ho. 
The Christmas CD we talked about earlier is done, just waiting  to get it packaged, but they are ready to order.  E mail me at Speedcatproductions@hotmail.com for Pay Pal instructions. They are 10 bucks each plus 2 bucks shipping, with the proceeds going to St Jude's Children's Hospital and Toys for Tots.  It's a great album featuring 10 great Las Vegas headliners. 

Within the next two weeks, there will be nowhere in town that you can go without being in the midst of Christmas music, trees, lights, Bell ringers (donate something this year) and good tiding of great joy. Not to mention all those great Black Friday deals!  It is the start of my favorite time of year, albeit totally commercialized. Oh well, we take it all. Heck, it's Christmas!! 

Do yourself a favor.  Between now and December 24th, make it a point to watch  It's a Wonderful Life, The Santa Clause, A Christmas Carol (my favorite is George C Scott), The Family Man, Holiday Inn, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Christmas Vacation, Home Alone, Christmas with the Kranks, The Christmas Story, And end it Prancer on Christmas Eve.  

Deck someone's halls and Jingle someone's bells this year.

Have a Great day.

Election is over, let's talk FOOD!

Election is over! (YAY) and we have a President Trump.  Cheer if you like, Swear if you're pissed.  Let's talk about Thanksgiving Dinner.

This year, we are doing T-day a week or so earlier with relatives coming to town.  As I am on the low carb / very little sugar diet, Holidays are going to be a bit different for me this year. First off, I have to stay away from the thing I wait all year for. My Martinelli's sparkling Cranberry/Apple juice. LOADED with sugars. 

My inspiration is that I have dropped 23 pounds in about 6 weeks by doing nothing more than cutting out 90% of carbs and sugars.  I DO feel better, and losing the weight has made it easier to RUN away from all those no no foods that tend to make me rounder. 

I still allow myself a little dark chocolate every day and some carbs.  But I have leaned that I do not have to eat the WHOLE loaf of french bread or the entire 1/4 pound chocolate bar.  

So, for Thanksgiving this year it's non hormone fed turkey, cornbread stuffing, (Half a serving for me) Green Beans and a bit of cranberry. Easy on the gravy as it FAT FAT FAT, and and some organic mashed potato (half my usual amount).

To drink, I have gone to Club Soda and lime. Refreshing and bubbly.

Where people get slammed dieting during the holidays, is, of course, candies and cakes and pies and ice cream, and of course alcohol.  (The 5 Holiday food groups).  My weakness being the baked goods. I don't drink, so I don't pour on the sugar there.  (Alcohol turns to sugar the minute it passes your teeth). I have given up doing the score card...you know,  If I don't have this, I can have this...does not work, because you have no willpower.  That is the key. Step away from the table.  Here is my challenge. Today, I weigh 223.7 pounds (from about 246 6 weeks ago). My goal through the holidays is not so much to lose a whole lot more, (That would be nice, but it's a lot of pressure) but to maintain where I am and not gain. I will occasionally end a blog with today's weight. But I will not make blogs here  about what I am eating...what a bore. Join me in the challenge. What the hell? 

Here is something my wife told me that has helped a lot. Your divine beings watching over you take you literally when you say stuff. Being your spiritual guardians, they try to help you. So if you say "I have lost XX pounds on this diet," they will find the weight you lost and give it back to you. Instead, think of it as Releasing the weight instead of losing it.  A simple mind thing, but hey, it works. 

Please become a follower.  Thanks! Have a great day!

I Think.......

I Think

There are 2 types of people in the world.  Those who participate, and those who watch.

Drivers who don't use turn signals should be banished forever in a land with nothing but Roundabouts. (look it up)

Stores should not be allowed to sell Christmas stuff until Halloween is over.  

If you can't control your kids in a restaurant that does not have a "kids menu" ... you should get them a happy meal and eat in the car. 

Cats know what we are thinking.....ALWAYS.

If you have a 420 credit score, you should not make that the car salesman's fault. 

There are two seasons in most parts of the county...Winter and Road Construction. 

If you commit to it, DO IT.

Anything that has more legs than me, or no legs and slithers should be avoided at any cost.

Everything in the universe is Energy.

Karma is a Bitch.

Aliens have not revealed themselves on earth because they know the first thing we will do is try to get them to vote.

If you have extra parts after disassembling and reassembling any machine, that you should put them in a drawer. Eventually you will figure out what they are for. Yup, give it time. 

A watched pot never boils, but if you drop your watch in boiling water, it's probably a goner. 

The shortest distance between 2 points is a straight line, unless you have to climb several mountain ranges, in which case, stay home.

Your computer will have an issue when you are on a deadline.

Gun control means you know what you are shooting at.

If you have 4000 friends on facebook, you should know the name of the person who lives next door to you. 

Money is the most renewable resource. 

Ask for it every day and the universe will provide. 

Superman can whip Batman's Butt. 

Every time you touch your smart phone screen, it sucks 1 brain cell out of your head.

If you are going to text me more than 50 words, just call.

Have a wonderful day!