Be happy in your perfect imperfection.

"No one is perfect".  How many times have we heard this or even used it as an excuse for lack of knowledge or experience?  

The whole perfection thing is a lot of pressure. We are raised to be the best we can be. That is WAYYYY different than being perfect.

You don't have to be perfect. Perfection is a illusion. It's unattainable. It's a unicorn.  Great to imagine, but in real life, it's still a horse with a horn glued to its head.  

However, there is a way, somewhat Taoist to look at this. If you have have imperfections, and those imperfections make up the person you are, then it would only fit that you are perfect in your imperfection. You are the perfect you. 

We are hit from all sides with media and peer pressure to look a certain way, or dress with a certain style, or have a perfect hair style yadda yadda yadda.....It tends to make one very self conscious about one's self.  You hear the horror stories every day. Young kids turning to drugs, self mutilation, depression, isolationism, suicide...all for what? Because they don't fit in with the latest trend. 

True, some people are genetically predisposed to "good looks" or "athleticism" or brilliance...and some are not as attractive, or strong or smart.  Nature will always balance. Yes, it has been proven that mates tend to gravitate toward the strongest of the herd. Or the prettiest..(example Bird of Paradise). In nature, this is for survival of the species. Humans do not have that problem. We get together, hang out, have sex with each other and boom....on goes the species. And yes, sometime alcohol is involved that makes you pair up with someone that for whatever reason you would not normally pair up with. 

Point is, there is someone for everyone. What I find unattractive in someone, the next person with see as the one they have been looking for all their life...perfect in their imperfections.  A lot of "imperfection" has to do with self image.  We all can do things to make changes in what we see as faults in ourselves. All good. Make those changes.  Embrace those changes. But, be sure you are doing it for the right reason. You can not be beautiful to others until you are beautiful to yourself.  You can only love others when you love yourself first.  Embrace your imperfections and love them. Life is a wonderful thing once you  realize that you don't have to be a clone on the model on TV who is pushing the latest "make yourself perfect" product.  Just be the best you that you can be.  

Have an "imperfect" day!

No B Side

As an observer of all things going on around me, it appears that the media has lost the fact there there is a B side to all that is going on in the world right now. 

Let me clarify. "B Side" is a music industry term that originates from when record labels release 45s. One song on each side. and A side (Which was supposed to be the hit song) and a B side which featured another song on the album that was good but not being considered as an A side single.  So, you played the A side song and the B side may NEVER get heard. 

Funny thing, though, sometimes people want to know what's on the B side. And occasionally, a B side song is a hit.  Maybe a DJ at a radio station played it by mistake. It's happened many time in the course of music history. Google "B SIDE HITS" and you will be surprised at what songs charted that were never supposed to be hits.  
Now, in the world of CDs and MP3, and streaming services, the B side is not a factor anymore and we now hear the Chart Cut and it's all we ever hear. (Listen to XM radio and tell me what the repeat rotation is) I was a radio DJ for many years. My luck was that they never made me follow the national rotation, and I was allowed to play what I wanted.  So, I mixed it up a lot and played songs that you didn't hear a lot, but everyone remembered. The songs you don't hear anymore."

I have a point to all this. Really.  It has to do with the news media. 

We are in a time of great division. It is not the first time, and it will not be the last time.  I don't choose sides, I observe what I perceive to be only A Side information.  All the media seems to thrive on is the anger and the negative energy that is spewed forth by people who don't or won't accept the current world and political situation. 
You see riots, and angry mobs, celebs who think they have the voice and ear of the people. And it's only so because the news media shoves it into your face and surrounds you with this hate and anger. All for ratings.  Bear with me. If  you are watching the news and there is rioting in the streets, and cars being set on fire, and you switch to the other news channel and see some warm and fuzzy story about happy people doing good things, do you shake your head and go back to the riots and anger because it's "more interesting?"  It's like listening to the first 10 seconds of a B side single and deciding that the A side song is better because that's what the record company has chosen to give you. It's what the networks chose to broadcast because they know that you will watch. 

I want to see the B side to all this hate and discontent. Show me the good. There is good in everything. It's the Yin and the Yang. You can not have one without the other.  Problem is, we are only looking at the Yang. We need a little more Yin I think.

I used to counsel teens. At the beginning of a group session, which I KNEW was going to be all about bitching about their parents and their life, as teens are prone to, I would go around the room and tell them to give me a HAPPY before we started. It had to be thought out . Not "I'm happy to be here...or I'm happy the 49ers won the Superbowl. (It was a long time ago) It had to be a genuine, happy feeling. It was hard for them. They were so programmed to be negative that it was beyond them to think that they had anything at all going for them. But.. they managed in the end to come up with something thought provoking. 

We have a higher power of some sort watching over us. I believe that.  Sometimes we just need to turn off the constant A side and flip to the B side and see what is there. It might be a better song. 

Have a great day.

I Have had to take a step back

I know it's been a couple of weeks since I have posted.  With all that is going on right now, new President, people happy about it, people not happy about it, people acting like total asses as well as those making their voice heard, using their first amendment rights the right way, I thought I would just sit back and take it all in.  I have been loath to write, because I don't like to get involved in politics in my blog if I can help it.  That being said, let me express my concern with people who take an event like the inauguration of our President, (like him or not) and make it an excuse for senseless violence. We the people have the right to protest. It's a right given by our forefathers. It's a wonderful thing. BUT, if you are going to throw bricks through windows of a business whose only fault is that the building is in firing range, then you have no right to bitch when you are arrested and charged with rioting and vandalism. You should go to jail. Do not pass go! You are a punk.

There is talk of paid protestors, other countries promoting this kind of thing and celebs cheering it all on.  I never thought in my life that I would agree with Michael Moore, but his statement rings true. If you want change, run for office. Start with your school board or City Council. Run for Congress or Senate, because it's not the other guy's responsibility to make the changes that you are passionate enough about to throw bricks through someone's business and drive up the cost of their goods.  If you want change, get off your ass and make your voice heard through the right channels. Calmly and purposefully. Violence leads to fear...fear leads to hate, and hate leads to the dark side of the force.  Peaceful protest will make your thoughts known. All for that! They will bring to the forefront all you are passionate about.  Change starts with you. Raise YOUR head above the crowd. Don't think you can? What makes anyone in office different than you? Maybe THEY decided that they wanted to be the voice in the crowd that was heard.  Love Trump or hate him.  He made his voice heard. He told people what he was passionate about. God bless him for being that person.  

So, these are my thoughts watching the events of the last few days.  I don't choose sides, I am not worried about what MIGHT happen....Only what is today. 

Have a great day!

Remember this when you look at ALL YOUR FRIENDS on Facebook...

I am currently writing a book. I have been working on it for quite a long time, because it's the kind of thing you have to write when the mood hits you, and you have a great thread of thought...much like a blog. It's a chance you take that anyone will be interested in what you have to say.  I enjoy writing, and I hope to someday E publish this book. If one person reads it and it helps them, then it was worth taking the time to do. 

The book is called The Self Help Book For People Who Hate Self Help Books (c)2016..... 

I have read a ton of self help books, some great, some not so...but most have one thing in common. They are written by people that have a lot of letters after their names. All good...not dissing anyone. I am writing mine from just years of observation and experience. I would like to share one of the chapters with you here, just because social media is such a thing now. We are get pulled into the Facebook Rabbit Hole. So here we go. This chapter from the book is called: 

But I Have 4627 Friends on Facebook

**********************************

Okay. Take a DEEP breath. All but about 12 of these people are not your friends. Maybe a few more or less. Go through your "Friends" on Face Book and write down the ones you would trust your kids, Dog or Spouse with. Who can you call as a house sitter if you have to go out of town? Yup. Short list. Multiply all this by the number of friends on Twitter, Voxer, Snap Chat Yadda Yadda Yadda and you still end up with about 12. So why are you sharing you most personal stuff with total strangers? And why do they think you really care about what they eat every 42 minutes? It's really gotten out of hand. Okay, so I am an entertainer. I have a couple of Face Book pages. I think I have a total of about 2500 "Friends" between the two pages. I perform and send invites to everyone. I figure asses in seats means ticket sales. But, at lets say, Christmas Time, if I want to send out a personal greeting to people on my pages, there are only MAYBE 30 people that I feel I know well enough to invade their personal space. And some of them are iffy. Don't let the number of "Friends" you have in cyber space lull you into a false sense of being all that. We are really not that important to anyone but ourselves. We measure our success in terms of likes, shares and comments. We have all done it. We have liked some crap on Facebook that we didn't spend more than a 10^th of a second looking at because the person is our “Friend” and we want all his “Friends” to see that I am his “Friend”...What a crock. In the great scheme of things, it's meaningless. There is no personal contact. It's an illusion that we have all these friends that we “Connect” with when we sitting at home in our underwear at 2 AM looking at our Facebook page because we have forgotten how to really communicate.

When something goes wrong and we put it on Facebook or instagram or Twitter, whatever your social media of choice, we get responses of condolence, prayers, advise, whatever from all these people we don't know. But how many of them are responding because they are really praying for you, and how many are just doing it because you had 231 other people do it and they want to feel like they are part of the collective conscience. That's all good and well if they actually say a prayer for you. How many times have YOU said someone was in your prayers and never thought about them again??

As a sales person, I sit and hand write 5 to 10 cards a day to clients that have bought cars from me. People I work with are astounded by this. That someone can actually sit down, with a pen and a blank card and envelope and write...in your own handwriting mind you.....a couple of sentences to another human being. It does not involve a keyboard, an e mail address or a data plan. It's olden days stuff. I actually had someone ask, “What do you do? Mail it?” It's a damned shame. It's a shame that these guys are missing out. I get calls from these clients thanking me for taking the time...(2 minutes) out of my day to think about them. Oh, and they come in and buy another car.

I have all my clients in an e mail database, I have a ton of them on Facebook, and yes it would save a lot of time and postage to just bulk email a big “How have you been” to 400 people at the same time. But, it's just another email. Lost in 50 others they just got. But when someone goes out and opens the mail box and there, nestled among the bills and junk is a bright blue envelope, with their name and address hand written upon it, well, That's special. Someone once said, If you can count your friends on both hands, you can count your REAL friends on just one hand, and out of those 5, maybe two are true friends. Be careful who you share your thoughts, loves, fears and food pictures with. All of it will be in cyber space, uh, FOREVER!

                                           ******************************

Hope you got something out of that. I hope to be done with the whole thing sometime this year!

Have a Great Day!

These questions need to be answered......

This was posted on Facebook. Needed to share here as well. enjoy
I am 57 years-old and I have so many unanswered questions!!!! I still haven't found out who let the Dogs Out...where's the beef...how to get to Sesame Street... why Dora doesn't just use Google Maps...Why do all flavors of fruit loops taste exactly the same, or how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop......why eggs are packaged in a flimsy paper carton, but batteries are secured in plastic that's tough as nails, yet light bulbs too are in a flimsy carton... Ever buy scissors? You need scissors to cut into the packaging of scissors... i still don't understand why there is Braille on drive up ATM's or why "abbreviated" is such a long word; or why is there a D in 'fridge' but not in refrigerator... why lemon juice is made with artificial flavor yet dish-washing liquid is made with real lemons... why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections... and, why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your thoughts" where's that extra penny going... why do The Alphabet Song and Twinkle Twinkle Little Star have the same melody... why did you just try to sing those two previous songs... and just what is Victoria's secret? ....and what would you do for a Klondike bar and you know as soon as you bite into it it falls apart...and Why do we drive on Parkways and park on Driveways? do you really think I am this witty?? ... I actually got this from a friend, who stole it from her brother's girlfriend's, uncle's cousin's, baby momma's doctor who lived next door to an old class mate's mail man...Now it is your turn to take it from me...Peace!!
Copy and Paste, change the age, and enjoy your day!!
Too funny not to post.

Happy New year 4.543 billion years

Welcome The New Year!! 4.543 Billion +/- half a million.  

We say it's 2017.  It's nice to have a calender to track our 24 hour periods and 7 day weeks and 52 week cycles.  Mother Earth, though, works on a different time cycle.  The planet does not give a stuff about what year WE say it is. Only about how old she is, and she is old. She breathes, she groans, she inhales and exhales.  

If she were only 2017 years old, she would still be an infant. Forming and volcanic and a place where this viral thing called man could have never survived. If you ask mother Earth, she will tell you she, at 4.5 Billion years old is but a not quite middle aged lady. 

She has had many face lifts, both natural over billions of years, and some man made thanks to large earth moving equipment.  She has been abused through cosmic bashing and atomic testing.  She has been warm and cold, flooded and parched... but she maintains her dignity and her beauty in the cosmos.  Not bad for a gal who is over 4.5 Billion years old. 

So HAPPY 2017 to us, and happy 4.543 Billion to Mother Earth! 

Have a great day

I Think (Part 3)

I THINK:

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.

Politicians and diapers should be both be changed regularly...all for the same reason

Light travels faster than sound.  That is why some people seem bright until they open their mouth

The shinbone's purpose is to find furniture in the dark

God mus LOVE stupid people, or he wouldn't have made so many

Some people say 'If you can't beat 'em, join 'em'  I say ' If you can't beat 'em, beat 'em, cause they will be expecting you to join them and you have the element of surprise....'

War does not determine who is right, only who is left

We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control

Laugh at your problems....everyone else does

I did not fight my way to the top of the food chain to eat tofu

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but a whole box can't start a campfire.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

Have a great day