Saturday, December 31, 2016

Happy New year 4.543 billion years

Welcome The New Year!! 4.543 Billion +/- half a million.  

We say it's 2017.  It's nice to have a calender to track our 24 hour periods and 7 day weeks and 52 week cycles.  Mother Earth, though, works on a different time cycle.  The planet does not give a stuff about what year WE say it is. Only about how old she is, and she is old. She breathes, she groans, she inhales and exhales.  

If she were only 2017 years old, she would still be an infant. Forming and volcanic and a place where this viral thing called man could have never survived. If you ask mother Earth, she will tell you she, at 4.5 Billion years old is but a not quite middle aged lady. 

She has had many face lifts, both natural over billions of years, and some man made thanks to large earth moving equipment.  She has been abused through cosmic bashing and atomic testing.  She has been warm and cold, flooded and parched... but she maintains her dignity and her beauty in the cosmos.  Not bad for a gal who is over 4.5 Billion years old. 

So HAPPY 2017 to us, and happy 4.543 Billion to Mother Earth! 

Have a great day

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

I Think (Part 3)

I THINK:

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.

Politicians and diapers should be both be changed regularly...all for the same reason

Light travels faster than sound.  That is why some people seem bright until they open their mouth

The shinbone's purpose is to find furniture in the dark

God mus LOVE stupid people, or he wouldn't have made so many

Some people say 'If you can't beat 'em, join 'em'  I say ' If you can't beat 'em, beat 'em, cause they will be expecting you to join them and you have the element of surprise....'

War does not determine who is right, only who is left

We have enough gun control. What we need is idiot control

Laugh at your problems....everyone else does

I did not fight my way to the top of the food chain to eat tofu

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but a whole box can't start a campfire.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

Have a great day




Friday, December 23, 2016

Don't Worry..You are not in control of anything..........

Each day the human mind spends over 70% of it's time over thinking and worrying.  That's a hell of a lot of time thinking about stuff that has not happened yet. 

Worry is one of the strongest "fear" emotions we have. We lose sleep, we have night sweats, we tend to think in worst case scenarios.  And it can drive us to the nut house in a hurry.  

The thing is, though, that if you look back on all the time you spent worrying about stuff, and the eventuality that the stuff you worried about never happened, what would you do with all that time that you wasted letting your brain take you hostage?  If the 70% number is true, then you spend 265 days a year worrying about stuff.  Over, say an 80 year life span, that 20,440 days, or 490,560 hours where you could be using your brain for something else. 

Life is short. We have no time for herding cats.  

The purpose of life is to be happy- Dalai Lama

We live in a world where the media works very hard to instill fear in us. Turn on the news and tell me how many happy stories do you hear in an hour?  Don't get me wrong, the world is not what it used to be. We have threats everywhere. We always have, but now we have a media that can bring it to us in real time in 4K high Def.  Our serenity is being attacked on all fronts. Here are some ways to deal with all this. 


Meditate. Get into being one with your consciousness.  Sit quietly and put processed thoughts out of your head. Concentrate of the sounds around you. The wind, the rain, the sound of the fly in the room. Live in the experience of now. Don't let the outside world allow your mind to wander.  If you hear a plane, or a fire truck, or a dog barking in the distance, just accept it as what is instead of letting your mind go somewhere else.  15 minutes a day. Not easy, but with practice, you can get it.

Don't watch the news for long periods. .... We all need to know what is going on, but don't leave the news on in the background all day while you are pottering around the house.  Watch the headlines, and get on with your day. Half the time, the news just pisses you off anyway, then you have to deal with anger too. 

Stay off facebook for a day every week. OR set a no information time.  Turn off from social media. Give it a rest. The world will continue to turn if you wait a day to like someone's post.

Sometimes, leave your phone at home.  Before cell phones, we went along our merry way, and when we got home, we had an answering machine.  We dealt with stuff then. As a result we saw more of the world around us.

Watch cartoons. No, seriously.  Who can have a shitty day after watching Bugs, or Daffy, or the Flintstones....Great old cartoons are a way to get back to a simpler time.  It really does take your mind off stuff. I believe if more adults watched cartoons once in a while, the world would be a better place. 

Go for a walk. See the world around you. (A good time to keep your phone at home) It's a beautiful place, remember?

And last but not least,  Don't worry..You are not in control of anything. 

Merry Christmas

Monday, December 19, 2016

The Entertainer and the Evil Agent: A tale of Warning for Las Vegas Entertainers

Once upon a time, there was an entertainer who was represented by an agent.  The agent would get the entertainer gigs, which the entertainer would do without hesitation or complaint. The entertainer even went as far as to drop what he was doing to rush to a gig because the person originally booked to do the gig crapped out.  In short, the entertainer was always there for the agent no matter how simple the gig. 

The agent, though, had a history of slow payment, which made the entertainer very frustrated indeed, but, eventually, after a slew of excuses, the agent finally paid, and everyone went upon their happy way. 

One day, in the 3rd month of the year, the agent called the entertainer and asked if he and his band of minstrels were available to do an out of town gig in the 9th month of the year.  The entertainer, after being told the amount of compensation for his time and travel, agreed to perform, and contracts were signed. The entertainer asked that the agent to please be sure the funds would be available before he and his band of minstrels travels across the vast distance to the high mountain where the gig was set. 'Oh, yes' replied the agent, assuring him that he would be compensated the day after he got back. To this, there was much rejoicing, and much time spent in preparation for the performance. 

On the day of the gig, the entertainer and his merry men (and wife who sings backup) arrived at the venue. A beautiful venue it was. Set in the mountains with a lovely outdoor stage.

About the time of the soundcheck, the leader of the venue came upon the entertainer and inquired if further requests for the band's services could be handled without the intervention of the agent, because lo and behold, they were without scruples and worse to deal with than a dragon on a bad day. This then became a red flag to the entertainer who told the leader of the venue that it would have to be discussed at another time, as there were stipulations in contracts that forbid such actions.  This was known as clause 10. 

The performance was stellar, and all had a great time, with the whole crowd staying for all three sets.  Standing ovations and encores prevailed. All was well with the world.  The entertainer loaded his gear into his rented Chrysler Town and Country, and drove across the many miles back to his kingdom.

And it came to pass that when the entertainer approached the agent for his due money, that the agent told him that the bank had not yet cleared the check, and he would have to wait 10 to 14 days for it to clear.  The entertainer waited a fortnight and there was still no joy. At this time, having heard the same tired story over and over again, he called upon the leader of the venue to see what the holdup was. The leader of the venue disclosed to the entertainer that compensation was indeed in the hands of the evil agent, and had been since the 1st month of the year when a deposit was sent, and again in the 8th month of the year when the remaining balance was sent, and that indeed the checks had been cashed long before the entertainer had journeyed to the land far away where the gig took place. 

This displeased the entertainer mightily as he realized that the agent had indeed lied to him and accepted deposit funds for the gig 3 months before even approaching him, and had, indeed contracted under his name not knowing if he was in fact available for the dates in question. Adding to his displeasure was the fact that the evil agent had been spending his money on what had to be frivolities and in no way intended to compensate our hero for his toil.

He sent a message though the royal email messenger telling the evil agent to please compensate him, or he would be forced to approach the royal solicitor to enforce the contract which the agent was in ginormous breach thereof. (Besides being a liar and thief). The agent reacted with a hearty 'bugger off' informing the entertainer that he should henceforth communicated only through his lawyer. A ruse to buy time, thinking that the entertainer would no do so. they were wrong. A call was sent out to the entertainer's lawyer, who upon seeing the situation, was ready to take proper action.

After many attempts to collect the money, the evil agent agreed to pay the sum due by the end of the 10th month.  The time came and went with no word or compensation,  and the Lawyer to this day has not been able to contact the evil agent, as they have gone back under the rock from whence they came, leaving the entertainer in the hole for a vast amount. 

The entertainer vowed not to rest until justice is done and compensation is settled upon.  If this does not happen by the 1st month of the new year, the entertainer shall disclose to the world the name, address, phone number and email address of the evil agent for all the world to see.  He shall discredit the evil agent all over social media, and expose them for what they really are. A lying, cheating, operating without a business license, hopeless, hapless, scum buggering bunch of slime balls. 

Merry Christmas And Happy New Year! 

The End

Friday, December 2, 2016

Sorry, I've been busy!

So, It's been since before Thanksgiving since I have been here putting my thoughts down.  For those of you who follow, my apologies.  Had to do the T-day thing, and have been really busy finishing up the Christmas album.  It is, by the way, ready and "IN THE CAN as we say in the industry. You can order through paypal. 12.00 USD includes shipping.  It's a collection of some of Las Vegas's greatest entertainers on one Christmas CD.  paypal to ronnieleetwist@gmail.com

So, lets talk about the holidays.  Happy Holidays, Merry Christmas, Feliz Navidad... I think the PC gang is sooooo worried about words and not paying attention to the meaning of the wish.  Stay with me here.  If I wish you Merry Christmas, and that offends you, I am sorry.  It's words.  If I wish you Merry Christmas and really send warmth and good energy to you, sincerity, love and friendship, that is more important than wishing you Happy Holidays just to say the words hoping I don't offend you.  I am a Christmas guy. If you wish me Happy Hanukkah, though I am not Jewish, I take that as a heartfelt wish from you to me. I will wish it back, and maybe even throw in a Merry Christmas to you.  It's a season of love. If you wish me a Happy Holiday, that's great too...but I think legislating whether we should have a Christmas Tree or a Holiday tree, or wishing Merry Christmas to someone can end you up in court because the PC police take offense to it is a stupid waste of people's time.  Believe what you want. Great thing about America. But don't try to force me to celebrate Happy Holiday when I choose to Celebrate Christmas just because it does not fit in with your particular agenda.   If we have become so sensitive that things like saying Merry Christmas sends someone over the edge, maybe we need to get them a puppy under their Holiday Tree. The other side of the coin is true too. Let's just all get along here. 

Bottom line... The words should not matter as much as the feeling of the season.  If  you wish me Happy Holidays, Happy Hanukkah, or Merry Christmas. or nothing at all, I will send you warm wishes of the season in return... always.  I chose MERRY CHRISTMAS.  Have a wonderful season of love and giving. 

Have a great day